Paul Foot – Still Life
Melburnians flocked to – and critics fawned over – louche comic Paul Foot’s debut at the Comedy Festival last year. Now he’s back to make more of no sense at all. He describes this year’s show as: The walls of Baron Ryan Carter’s castle have ears and a rudimentary mouth, which whispers of the 23 comments of old that changed the world, now in the hands and voice box of Mr Paul Foot.
When? 29th March – 22nd April | Tue – Sat 9:45 PM | Sun 8:45 PM
How much? Full Fri & Sat $31 | Group (8 or more) $28.50 (N/A Sat) | Conc. $25.50 (N/A Sat) | Cheap Tues. $25.50 – Buy Tickets
Where? Melbourne Town Hall 
1. Describe your show Twitter style, 140 characters or less!
From the nebula of nothingness in the perspex jungle of youth flows the nubile elixir of the trombone fruit, microwave for two minutes.
2. Since you’re a comedian, is there a lot of pressure to be funny on a first date?
I normally go down the funny peculiar route. I subject my date to a horrific picnic in which I appear as a pirate and slash the pork pies with a cutlass before releasing my parrot.
3. Speaking of, what’s your ideal date activity?
The perfect date is a bit of fine dining followed by a spot of espionage in a hotel lobby, followed by a bit of touching the forbidden fruits.
4. A movie that made you cry?
I don’t really watch films, there are too many women walking on, and things moving, and men wearing hats, I can’t keep up with them.
5. What do you do when you get sad?
Phone my impossibly hopeless assistant Jack Cullen and tell him that he’s sacked. His unhappiness fills me with joy.
6. When and/or why did you decide to become a comedian?
I was desperate to meet Ella Fitzgerald, and I thought comedy was probably my best way of getting into show business, but then Ella died a few weeks after I began and then I just though – oh well, I may as well press on, no time to muck about.
7. Favourite comedian?
Dionne Warwick’s pretty good, I like Angela Lansbury, news readers, that sort of thing.
8. What do you want to be when you grow up?
As far as I am aware, I am fully grown now. I’m a full-sized comedian with sufficient soil and foliage, I just need regular water and sunshine and a nice spot on a window ledge with something good to look at.
9. Funniest YouTube clip you’ve seen?
I like this series called Hairbox Thrillers in which hair dye boxes chat to each other about wanting to kill each other, it’s so incredibly bad that it’s just brilliant.
[youtube=”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4f-EazG0sU&w=500″]
10. Which artist/comedian are you looking forward to seeing at the Festival?
I prefer to support my friends at their slightly more obscure tour dates earlier in the year, and then at festivals it’s so busy I just catch glimpses here and there and catch-up with comedians over cake and discuss banking news, the latest botany trends and the meaninglessness of everything.
